Best 100 short funny jokes based on visitors votes. Please rate funny short jokes by clicking on smiles, so funniest jokes will be also best jokes on our web site!
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During a recent password audit, it was found that a blonde was using the following password:
When asked why such a big password, she said that it had to be at least 8 characters long.
rating: 3.61 of 628 votes
When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat the problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion to develop a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to 300 C.
The Russians used a pencil.
rating: 3.61 of 582 votes
Why was the computer tired when he got home?
Because he had a hard drive.
rating: 3.61 of 973 votes
A little girl asked her mother, "How did the human race appear?"
The mother answered, "God made Adam and Eve and they had children, and so was all mankind made.."
Two days later the girl asked her father the same question.. The father answered, "Many years ago there were monkeys from which the human race evolved."
The confused girl returned to her mother and said, "Mom, how is it possible that you told me the human race was created by God, and Dad said they developed from monkeys?"
The mother answered, "Well, dear, it is very simple. I told you about my side of the family and your father told you about his."
rating: 3.6 of 542 votes
One day the kids in Ms. Evans science class was disagreeing with her.
Ms. Evans was talking about evolution. Ms. Evans was and atheist so she didn't believe in God.
Then Johnny raised his hand and said, "But I thought God created mankind?"
Ms. Evans then replied, "Well can you see God?"
"No." This went on for quite a while.
"Well then God doesn't exist."
Then Johnny whispered back to his friend Jimmy, "Can you see Ms. Evan's brain. No, so that must not exist."
rating: 3.6 of 570 votes
Little Billy came home from school to see the families pet rooster dead in the front yard.
Rigor mortis had set in and it was flat on its back with its legs in the air.
When his Dad came home Billy said, "Dad our roosters dead and his legs are sticking in the air. Why are his legs sticking in the air?"
His father thinking quickly said, "Son, that's so God can reach down from the clouds and lift the rooster straight up to heaven."
"Gee Dad that's great," said little Billy.
A few days later, when Dad came home from work, Billy rushed out to meet him yelling, "Dad, Dad we almost lost Mom today!" "What do you mean?" said Dad.
"Well Dad, I got home from school early today and went up to your bedroom and there was Mom flat on her back with her legs in the air screaming, "Jesus I'm coming, I'm coming" If it hadn't of been for Uncle George holding her down we'd have lost her for sure!"
rating: 3.58 of 479 votes
In a maternity hospital the wife delivered a son.
The husband asked his wife: "I am white, you are white, why is it that the child is black?"
The wife replied: "I am hot and you are hot. The child must have been burnt"
rating: 3.58 of 26 votes
Q: What happens when you feed gun powder to a chicken?
rating: 3.57 of 699 votes
Teacher: What makes you see?
Bobyjack: My eyes, my nose and my ears.
Teacher: True for the eyes but why for your ears and nose?
Bobyjack: It's to hold my glasses!!!
rating: 3.57 of 559 votes
Teacher: Be sure that you go straight home
Student: I can't, I live just round the corner!
rating: 3.57 of 639 votes