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Best 100 short funny jokes based on visitors votes. Please rate funny short jokes by clicking on smiles, so funniest jokes will be also best jokes on our web site!
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jokes: 91 - 100 of 100
category: Yo mama jokes91.

Yo mamma so stupid, when I said lets hit the dance floor, she stated hitting it.

joke rating: 3.55 of 616 votes

category: Kids jokes92.

Which runs faster, hot or cold?

Hot. Everyone can catch cold.

joke rating: 3.55 of 613 votes

category: Family jokes93.

A wife told his husband to whisper her dirty things, the man then replied, "The kitchen, the living room, the conservatory and the dining room."

joke rating: 3.55 of 681 votes

category: Religious jokes94.

This man goes to confession and says, "Forgive me father for I have sinned." The priest asks if he would like to confess his sins and the man replies that he used the "F-word" over the weekend.
The priest says, "Oh okay, just say three Hail Marys and try to watch your language."
The man replies that he would like to confess as to why he said the "F-word". The priest sighs and tells him to continue.
Well father I played golf on Sunday with my buddies instead of going to church.
The priest says, "And you got upset over that and swore?"
The man replied, "No, that wasn't why I swore. On the first tee I duck-hooked my drive well left into the trees."
The priest said, "And that's when you swore."
The man replied, a little testily because of the constant interruptions, "No, it wasn't. When I walked up the fairway, I noticed my ball got a lucky bounce and I had a clear shot to the green. However, before I could hit the ball, a squirrel ran by and grabbed my ball and scurried up a tree."
The priest asked, "Is that when you said the 'F-word'?"
The man replied, "No, because an eagle then flew by and caught the squirrel in its sharp talons and flew away."
The priest let out a breath and queried, "Is that when you swore?"
The man replied, "No, because the eagle flew over the green and the dying squirrel let go of my golf ball and it landed within 5 inches of the hole."
The priest screamed, "Don't tell me you missed the f...ing putt!!!"

joke rating: 3.55 of 618 votes

category: Women jokes95.

A nice lady in a short skirt walks up to a police man on the street and says, "I have a problem."
The police man asked her what it is, she points to a man across the street and says, "See that man?"
The police man replies, "Yes, is he watching you?"
She replies, " NO!, that is the problem!"

joke rating: 3.55 of 609 votes

category: Bar jokes96.

A man walks into a bar with a set of jumper cables around his neck. The bartender points at him and says, " I'm gonna let you in this time, but don't you start anything"!

joke rating: 3.55 of 606 votes

category: Animal jokes97.

Two neighbors are talking to each other.
First neighbor: Do you know that my dog is so smart, he waits for the newspaper to drop at the doorstep and then delivers it to me?
Second neighbor: Of course, I know that very well.
First neighbor: Really, well then, how?
Second neighbor: My dog came and told me.

joke rating: 3.55 of 662 votes

category: Retirement jokes98.

Working people frequently ask retired people what they do to make their days interesting.
Well, for example, the other day my wife and I went into town and went into a shop. We were only in there for about 5 minutes. When we came out, there was a cop writing out a parking ticket. We went up to him and said, "Come on man, how about giving a senior citizen a break?"
He ignored us and continued writing the ticket. I called him a Nazi turd. He glared at me and started Writing another ticket for having worn tires. So my wife called him a ****-head. He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first. Then he started writing a third ticket. This went on for about 20 minutes. The more we abused him, the more tickets he wrote.
Personally, we didn't care. We came into town by bus.

joke rating: 3.55 of 599 votes

category: Political jokes99.

I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., I called the Suicide Lifeline.
I got a call center in Pakistan , and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck.

joke rating: 3.55 of 607 votes

category: Blonde jokes100.

A woman yells to a blonde walking along a river, "How do I get on the other side!?" The blonde says, "You are on the other side!"

joke rating: 3.55 of 640 votes

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